Sunday, October 24, 2004 Thoughts from Kelly: I am encouraged by all the support, prayers, and comfort we have received. "My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life." Psalm 119:50 Some in the hospital do not see hope, but we have a great hope in Christ. "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Romans 5:3-5 I would like to thank everyone for their prayers and gifts. The last week has flowed through my hands like water. Every day has had a life threatening decision to make. The grace of God has carried my wife and I through each day. "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34 God has given us peace about our situation, we are concerned about a great many things, but this keeps us in prayer. We have not worried throughout this whole ordeal. I know Jesus is with us through this whole situation with Micah; we are not alone. Friday I came into the emergency room without a clue as to what my life would turn into; a week later, we still don't know. There have been a great many little answers to prayer, and we wait for God to finish his work in Micah. I thank God for each of you and your prayers. All the testing has been done, and anything we begin now is educated guessing. Pray for wisdom through this whole process for me, my wife, the doctors, nurses, neurologists, anesthesiologists, etc. Micah looks great. I think the hardest part has been seeing him look so great and all the tests coming back normal, and yet his mind isn't. So often it is what we cannot see that is even more important than what is visible to our eyes. God searches the inmost parts and everything is laid bare before him—including Micah's mind. It is comforting to know He will take care of him. I am writing my thoughts down to share the lessons I have learned. Over the next few days and weeks, my thoughts will help you understand God's presence in our suffering and that His Spirit is our comfort. I do not know what to expect tomorrow but today is enough. So take heart; even in this suffering there is hope. And no matter the outcome, we rejoice in the love of Christ for us and Micah. Thank you. Pray hard. It is Micah's cure. In Christ's love, Kelly Thoughts from Jennifer: I wanted to let everyone know how I am doing with the events of these last ten days. As you can imagine this has been a very hard, emotional time. Time has no boundaries and it's hard to keep track of what day it is or how long we've even been here. Micah right now in every way looks like a healthy beautiful baby. It's hard not to think maybe they are wrong, and it's all a big mistake. But we know God doesn't make mistakes, and that's what I really wanted to focus on in writing this. I have never been so sad or felt so physically and emotionally drained, but I also have never known so much comfort and peace and strength which only comes from God. I have so much comfort and, yes, even joy as I have read God's Word and spent most of every day in prayer. So much scripture has come alive as I read and see how God is speaking to me. At the end I will share some of the Scriptures that have helped me through this difficult time and given me so much hope. I pray that you too will be comforted. One of the key scriptures that God has given to me as an amazing source of comfort is Psalm 139—especially verses 13-16 and specifically verse 16. I repeat it over and over each day as a reminder of who is in control. "Your eyes saw my unformed body, all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." We know that God made Micah, and He made him the way he is. He has a plan and purpose for his life that He ordained before his precious life was even formed. I find so much peace and strength in focusing on that. We know that God can bring good out of all things, and our job is to give God the glory in all things. We praise Him for Micah. We thank Him for entrusting us with this special boy and trusting us to be faithful with this difficult experience. We know we have a long road ahead of us, but the best way for me to deal with this is to live one day at a time, one moment at a time giving my baby back to God and trusting Him to know what is best. We have already grown and been changed so much that. I know it may sound crazy, but it's actually exciting to think of what God can do and is going to do in the future. Despite what the doctors say, we know God could completely heal Micah, but if He doesn't, we know that is also part of His plan. He not only gave Micah to us to care for but He knew we needed Micah to be the people He desires us to be. We have so much hope because we have an awesome God who loves us more than we can even imagine. He has given us salvation only by His grace, and He has given us an inheritance in heaven. This world is not our home but we, and Micah, have the promise of eternity in a perfect home, in perfect bodies. What a difference it makes to have this confidence in our Lord and His sovereignty! We have had the opportunity to meet many families who are here with sick children. Many are Christians and have been a huge encouragement and inspiration to us. Those who don't know the Lord handle their experience here so differently. God has just expanded our ministry opportunities in being here. I will later share with you some of what we have experienced here and others you can pray for. I need to go now but we will keep you updated when we can. Thank you so much for your prayers and support. We are overwhelmed by the love and help we have received. God is so good! Your prayers continue to be the best thing you can do for us. We are praying to the God of the universe who has chosen to love us. He is slow to anger, compassionate, abounding in love and hears our prayers. Prayer is powerful. We know we have many people praying for us—an army of voices on Micah's behalf. "O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. You hem me in--behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me; your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, 'Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,' even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you. If only you would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me, you bloodthirsty men! They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD, and abhor those who rise up against you? I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies. Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139 "Surely he will never be shaken; a righteous man will be remembered forever. He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. His heart is secure, he will have no fear; in the end he will look in triumph on his foes" Psalm 112:6-8 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28 "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us." Romans 5:1-5 "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." Romans 8:18 "Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come. Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it." 2 Corinthians 5:1-9 "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body." 2 Corinthians 4:7-11